Advert.

Do NOT tell your scammer he is posted here, or report their accounts as it puts others at risk!

Scammer UPDATE 10-7

Stories we feel worth sharing with others are moved here.

Scammer UPDATE 10-7

Unread postby bb72 » Sun Oct 07, 2012 6:56 pm

Hi everyone,

After a month of no contact, I got several texts at 3am last night from my scammer. My cell was on vibrate and luckily I didnt wake up from it. He sms texted me from yahoo IM. I woke up, went on google and searched on how to block ALL texts from yahoo im, and did it. I then deleted my AIM user id and account, set up filters on ALL of his email address I know of, so that if a message comes from him, it will go right into the trash. My friends are all screaming at me to do something TO him, to talk to him and to fight back, etc. I was crying talking to my best friend telling her I couldn't put myself out there like that again for this man. I am too afraid to fight back and won't, I know its not like my personality to just lie back and take the sh*t someone gives me, but this has ROCKED ME emotionally and its been hard enough to put this behind me without opening up old wounds again. I will NOT EVER allow myself to be open to these attacks on me again, not emotionally or any other way. I NEED TO JUST WALK AWAY. Fighting back and even texting again with him will do nothing but open up old wounds I have been doing so well at healing and closing up for good. No one seems to understand this but me. So, I thought I would write you guys again to get some feedback from those of you who have been romance-scammed like me.
<recently burned but trying to heal>
bb72
Junior survivor
 
Posts: 15
Joined: Thu Sep 20, 2012 12:41 am
Location: Jersey

Re: Scammer UPDATE 10-7

Unread postby Wayne » Sun Oct 07, 2012 7:10 pm

You're doing absolutely the right thing. Firstly, as you say, any contact with him will open up old wounds. Secondly, if you talk to him at all then he'll see it as reason to keep on trying to talk to you and you run the risk of being sucked back into his scam. We've seen it happen to others, so there's always a possibility of it happening. Keep strong and remember that we're here if you need to talk.
Click HERE for webcam blackmail/sextortion help.
Do NOT email me for sextortion help. Use the link above. If you ignore this, your message WILL be deleted.
Image
User avatar
Wayne
Site owner/"cruel and sarcastic" admin.
 
Posts: 58360
Joined: Mon Apr 16, 2012 5:13 pm

Re: Scammer UPDATE 10-7

Unread postby Ruffled Feathers » Sun Oct 07, 2012 7:15 pm

Hi bb72

I am sorry he tried to scam you again, or at least let you know he was following you around. You did all the right things, blocking him - his emails, phone calls,and sending all his junk to "junk"......because that's what he is ---- JUNK, low life.

I had the same happen and once I blocked him for the second time, that's when full recovery and healing takes over. You are absolutely right not to do anything that might bring him back into your life. Unfortunately your friends do not really understand a scam, so it is best to ignore their requests that you do something to get even with your scammer --- you will be the one hurt, again, not them.

Your posting gives the impression that you really are on the way to full recovery and healing, because you did so much to refuse his ovations of trying to reach you once again. Very smart on your part.

Just stay strong now, get lots of rest, and eat properly, and don't look back. There is an old saying, yesterday is history, tomorrow is the future, today is a gift, that is why it is called the present. You just gave yourself a huge present by sending this creep to junk.

Keep up the good work, we are all here for you, or come to the chat room and just talk, it helps.

Take good care of you now,
RF
A scammer is only as good as the fear he creates.
User avatar
Ruffled Feathers
Senior survivor
 
Posts: 202
Joined: Thu Apr 19, 2012 12:46 am

Re: Scammer UPDATE 10-7

Unread postby Tomi » Sun Oct 07, 2012 7:55 pm

Hi bb72,

Wayne and RF are right; you did the right thing of not making any contact. It is typical for them to attempt to contact you again. It happened to me too a few weeks after I realized I was scammed and stopped the contact---attempted calls, emails, YMs---but I ignored all of them because I knew that was the right thing to do. As you know, even just one reply to them will not do you any good; instead it will only lead to more lies, hurt and the danger of you being sucked in again. These lowlifes, these ugly Nigerian criminals do not deserve anymore of your time or thought. They did scam and trick you once, do not let them do it again. This time, you are the one in control. Just be super strong with this, do not give in.

Not fighting back does not mean that you are weak. It means that you are smart and strong enough to do what is right. And what is right is to never look back but to move on, to move forward with your healing and believe that there will be better days ahead. Just be patient on yourself and that day will eventually come when you will be completely healed and be back on your feet again or even a much better person than you have ever been. Take care! :)

Tomi
User avatar
Tomi
Senior survivor
 
Posts: 237
Joined: Tue Apr 17, 2012 1:47 am

Re: Scammer UPDATE 10-7

Unread postby bb72 » Sun Oct 07, 2012 9:46 pm

THANK YOU ALL OF YOU for your encouraging words! It means so much to me to have people who understand my point of view and why i can't reply to any of his messages!! My friends dont get it, they say they do but they don't. I am much stronger now and by not fighting back I am taking a silent stand against him by controlling MY FATE and protecting MY LIFE AND HEART from his lies! YOU GUYS ROCK THANKS SO MUCH!!!
<recently burned but trying to heal>
bb72
Junior survivor
 
Posts: 15
Joined: Thu Sep 20, 2012 12:41 am
Location: Jersey

Re: Scammer UPDATE 10-7

Unread postby duckhunter » Mon Oct 08, 2012 12:01 am

bb72, please don't be hard on your friends for not understanding. I think all of us who have been scammed found ourselves running into walls in that area ... turns out that nobody can really understand what you've been through unless they've been there themselves.

Here's something that happened to me that will help you see I am speaking from experience: A few years back my roommate decided that doing victim support and anti-scam work was not good for me. He decided this right in the middle of a phone call between Wayne and myself ... and unplugged the phone. From that point onward he would not allow me to speak on the phone with Wayne at all. Then he gave me an ultimatim -- give up the scam work or be booted out. So I did the right thing ... I left. He was surprised.

Not all stories will be quite as harsh as mine, but it's an example of how far well-meaning people will go to try to protect us in absolutely the wrong way.

Which is why we do our best to talk new survivors into spending time with us ... we know what you've been through and we want to help in a non-judgmental and supportive way that will lead to you being the same beautiful person you always were, only stronger.
"It is good to see what is beautiful, but you must also observe the ugly things ... you must be awake to everything ... you must be exposed to things which you don't quite understand, for the more you ponder over these matters which may be difficult for you, the greater will be your capacity to live richly." Krishnamurti.
User avatar
duckhunter
Insert funny custom rank here.
 
Posts: 502
Joined: Thu Apr 19, 2012 7:03 pm
Location: Universe City

Re: Scammer UPDATE 10-7

Unread postby Vexed » Mon Oct 08, 2012 5:12 am

:D Hi bb! You already know how I feel about you coming back! You made my day. ;) I was angry at my family/friends too for not wanting to talk about my scam or even try to understand it. Duckhunter is right, no one could possibly understand unless they have been through it themselves. Heck, before I was scammed, i had heard about it being a problem but never put much thought into it. Romance scams hit you with a double wammie!! Not only do they take your money, they rob you of much more. It will be some time before I can REALLY trust anyone again (especially men...no offence guys!) ;) I certainly won't be joining any date sites or go into chat rooms any time soon, if ever.

The support here is awesome! You don't have to talk about anything you don't want to, some days I just stroll around and read other peoples posts, and don't talk to anyone. It is comforting to know that there are others out there going through similar if not the same feelings.

I love your attitude about not letting him take any thing else from you, that shows how strong you are and like I said before, you will come out of this tougher and wiser. Keep up the good work! :D

Remember, I am here to PM or chat, anytime.
"I may not be there yet, but I'm closer than I was yesterday."~Unknown~

"Tricks and treachery are the practice of fools, that don't have brains enough to be honest."~Benjamin Franklin~
User avatar
Vexed
Junior survivor
 
Posts: 50
Joined: Tue Aug 14, 2012 9:29 pm
Location: Floating on a breeze in Shangra La...

Re: Scammer UPDATE 10-7

Unread postby Big Al » Mon Oct 08, 2012 11:39 am

^^^ Awesome show of support from the members here. Makes me feel good just knowing they're here to help people. Keep up the great work Survivors!
"Look for the lies."
Being Blackmailed? Go here and do this first: https://blackmailscams.com/
The information you supply can help others from becoming Victims.
Image
User avatar
Big Al
"Little pee nut" admin.
 
Posts: 84973
Joined: Fri Apr 27, 2012 10:48 pm

Re: Scammer UPDATE 10-7

Unread postby Sunflower3 » Mon Oct 08, 2012 7:56 pm

Hi q

Hi bb, I know how you feel because I was also recently scammed by someone posing as a Commanding Officer in the US Military stationed in Kabul, Afghanistan from the POF site although he did not get much from me but still it kind of changes you in some ways. I am not going to let it jade me as there are some very nice men on the site so please do not be discouraged.

I have learned a tremendous amount from this experience and I am now much better equipped to know the signs if someone is a scammer. I am new to this site and just registered today so you may already have some of this information but I thought I would pass it along anyways because I believe knowledge is power so here goes.

After I was scammed I did tons of research and one great website is the C.I.D. one which is the US Army Criminal Investigation Command and they give great tips on scams. Another site I came across is called Topix.com and alot of women all over the world are posting information about men who have scammed them that are posing as US Military guys. Another website is IC3, Internet Crime Complaint Center. Apparently, alot of these scammers say they are on peace-keeping missions in places like Nigeria, Afghanistan etc. but if you go on the United Nations website you can see at present there are 15 peace-keeping missions around the world. Also, I went onto the US Military website and did some digging and found out who the scammer was impersonating which happened to be a high ranking officer who is now since retired. Also, look up the IP address in any e-mails you receive from these people and also do a google image search as these scammers steal photos of real military men off the internet etc. and use them to scam women.

I have watched tons of videos of where women have been scammed anywhere from $40,000 - $400,000 by these scammers who are largely based in places like Nigeria, Ghana and elsewhere.

I also sent an e-mail to the POF site and told them what happened to me so they are definitely getting alot of complaints from women who have been scammed.

I know it is hard to trust someone after this has happened but remember, you now have lots of knowledge to arm yourself with so trust me it will never happen to people like you or me again because now we know better.

I will not use my real e-mail account anymore and have opened a gmail account to use for the people who wish to correspond with me from the POF site. Also, if a person wants to move the conversation from the site to either skype, yahoo, etc. quickly then you can rest assured it is a scam and they want to get the conversation off the POF site. I hope some of the information I have given has been helpful for you.

Please take care and remember to smile. P
Sunflower3
New survivor
 
Posts: 1
Joined: Mon Oct 08, 2012 7:02 pm

Re: Scammer UPDATE 10-7

Unread postby SlapHappy » Tue Oct 09, 2012 12:22 am

nice going, bb72. Hang tough and silent, knowing the silence from you drives them MAD! :lol: :twisted:
They waste time trying you again, and other victims can be saved by their time-wasting efforts.

Welcome, Sunflower3. I'm sorry that you were scammed. :( Can you post your scammer's details here like the rest of our survivors did, so that you can save other victims the same fate as you suffered from your scammer?
Thanks for taking the time to join and post here. :)
If anyone asks you for money on the Internet they are always a scammer, 100% of the time.
Blackmail Scammed? Go here: https://www.scamsurvivors.com/blackmail/#/
FAQ viewtopic.php?f=3&t=19
Victim of a scam? Go here: https://scamsurvivors.com/forum/viewtop ... =3&t=26504
User avatar
SlapHappy
Retired admin/co creator
 
Posts: 44968
Joined: Tue Apr 17, 2012 5:18 am
Location: Just a face in a magazine, watching you post your scammer's details.


Return to Tell your story here.

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 10 guests