You need to exit this situation, and take care of yourself, first. Pro-daters are the most dangerous kind of romance scammers. They will actually meet the victims briefly, sometimes sleep with them if it is necessary to support the fantasy and get money, but all the rest of the promises are fantasy. They will tenaciously defend their story, and will do anything it takes to keep their victims until every last dime is extracted out of them, and then dump them.
They will say any lie, use any tactic to isolate the victim and attack anyone trying to convince the victim that they are scammers. They do not care about the fallout in the families of the victims, their friends, anyone. It's all about money.
You have done all that you can, but it is time to get out of it, and pray that he finally gets what is going on and drops her. Listen to some of our podcasts with romance-scammed victims. It may help you to understand what is going on in his head right now, and how he got there. viewtopic.php?f=3&t=1370