recovery and reassurance

[hopefullywillhelp]

Why don't you give yourself a break, and wait an entire month? That will be more meaningful to others, and cause less worry all around.

Ok, will do. Thanks again.

[hopefullywillhelp]

It's now been a full month since I was hit with the webcam blackmail scam/sextortion and just as others have described, I feel better about it pretty much everyday. Nothing has happened as far as I can tell and the recent Facebook account hacking scandal actually provided me with a great excuse to friends and family as to why my account is deactivated so that is an extra bonus. Thanks again to all who contribute and help keep this site.

[whatreyougonnadonow]

So I'm another victim of the skype sextortion scam. It's been a little over a week since my interaction with "them." I've been totally anxious and depressed during this time. It started on the HotorNot App. I was contacted first and then it escalated to skype where I did exactly what I shouldn't have. Immediately as this interaction ended, they shared their screen with me. All I saw was myself mortified and my Facebook page open. They were opening links to my friends and copying and pasting from a notepad. They started writing messages to my friends with my facebook url attached saying that they would send the video to them (there was no video link yet). They were obviously logged into Facebook and I saw their name started with a "G" but they had no profile picture. I initially panicked and started bargaining with them, offering them really small sums of money saying that I'm broke. Then, I hung up and blocked them on Skype. I privated everything on Facebook then deactivated it. After all this, I went back to Skype and unblocked them. I received a message that said "SO WHAT NOW?". I ignored that and kept my boundaries (blocked them again on skype). I never saw the video playback, neither did I receive a youtube link. The only links they sent me was a link to my Facebook and a link to the Western Union website. My total interaction time with them was easily under an hour.

My Facebook has remained deactivated since then; but I do log in from time to time to see if they made a fake account of mine. They are blocked from sending me anything on Skype and I have not checked to see if they've said anything.
On Facebook, I changed my name, deleted my profile picture, and changed my url. All privacy settings are set to "only me" or "friends of friends" (where "only me" isn't an option.) Also, deactivated.

The night this happened, I only deleted the HotorNot app, not my profile. The next day, I re-downloaded it to see if there was anything new and the scammer's profile was gone. I then closed that account.

I haven't deleted the email accounts associated with my Facebook and Skype and I check them multiple times a day to see if there's been any contact. They have made no effort to contact me since the incident. I'm also not sure what contact information they have on me, almost sure my Skype is all they had. I've left my Instagram and Twitter up but they are not connected to my real name, neither am I in any profile pictures.

I've had 2 sketchy things happen since then: 1. Random Instagram follower request (didn't accept it, reported it from multiple Instagram accounts for pornography but it didn't get taken down or anything, so I'm assuming that account is fine but I still did not accept it) 2. A missed call from "unknown caller" on my phone. These could easily be totally unrelated but I'm still skeptical.

It's been 8 days and I'm still petrified. I've been living in constant terror and I'm a depressed mess. I read every post in recovery and reassurance and it helped me feel better. There's been 0 contact since. I want to know if I'm in the clear and doing the right thing or not. It seems like I'm in the clear because from what I've read, they try contact and threat immediately and if you don't bite then they move on.

Please let me know, every situation is different but this website has kept me going even in my darkest times. I thank you all, especially the moderators. Your help and advice is much appreciated.

[SlapHappy]

After 8 days he has probably moved on, but stick to the steps for the entire time.
Also, do all of them, whether you think they are important or not. Three come to mind in the steps that you have not done.

Logoff the skype account used with the scammer, and never use it again. Blocking is not enough.
Deactivate or delete all social profiles, this includes Instagram and Twitter. Can't live without social media? Wanna risk them finding you? I think not, but your choice and your risk. We just give steps that work best if all are done.
Do not reactivate Facebook to check for messages or anything else. Keep off it for the entire waiting period. You can check for fake accounts without logging in to FB, and in your case I doubt you will see any if you have not yet seen any by now.

I think the scammer already has the message that there is no money in it for them, so relax. Money is their motivation, not ruining your life or some other lie they told you. No news is good news. Focus on doing something constructive with your offline time. Some find the waiting period off social media liberating, and never realized how much wasted time and social isolation they have spent with all that "annoying noise" in their heads and with all those "Updates beeping on their phones."
A large part of your depression is not caused by the scammer and worrying about what he might do, but the lack of the constant connection to social media. Fill that empty time with something better.

[whatreyougonnadonow]

Thank you so much for your response SlapHappy, I was beginning to think I was alone in this but the reassurance from other really helps.
After realizing that I should've used better judgement, I reduced my online footprint. You can barely find me on Google anymore. Some of my old accounts pop up, but do not link to any social media accounts.
I feel like since I barely interacted with him, he moved on. But of course, I can't be sure.
My anxiety has been eating away at me since this happened but I am getting a little stronger. I really hope it does not leak.

[SlapHappy]

Falling down is not important. It's the getting up that is.

[SlapHappy]

Just yesterday, this recovery and reassurance topic has reached 1.5 million reads. I sincerely hope that the members' contributions here have helped to overcome the damage created by scammers to others' lives. I hope that it has convinced readers that recovery from being scammed is not only possible, but shown to make the survivors here stronger, looking forward in a better direction in their lives . I hope that this topic has taught them that they have responsibilities to protect themselves in the future from the dangers of the internet lurking online, just waiting to hurt them again in the same way or in another if they do not educate themselves.

The "Christmas Holiday Push" is going full strength right now. The scammers want their new iPhones , PCs, and Holiday Cash. If anyone online you have never met before is asking for money or gifts, they are always a scammer. Real people NEVER ask for such things of others online; no matter what the "good excuse" they tell you, they are lying and trying to scam you for every last dime you have. If you run into a scammer, please stop talking to them and post their details on the forum.
Forum rules and frequently asked questions.
https://www.scamsurvivors.com/forum/vie ... p?f=3&t=19
What to do if you are a victim of a scam
viewtopic.php?f=3&t=26504


What have you done to help yourself get over your scam? We would like to hear it.

[Peanutbuttahlovah]

Hello guys
I am greatly grateful with this site, i became victim of the skype cam scam a week ago and it felt terrible, i was really scared the video actually got posted and people at my work find out and that would result in me getting fired, i instantly cut communication with the scammer and deactivated all my accounts (dissapeared from the web) the last message he sent me was "this is your last chance i am sending the video to your family and friends, he used my phone number to locate my facebook that did not exist anymore, but good thing is i did not have coworkers or family there just real friends that helped me cope with the fear as i am very open to them (most have seen me naked already) but the first night was horrible i did not slept at all and was sweating in the bed the whole time.

Later i found that i suffered a crime and investigated more about it but it was not enough i wanted to know of other people experiences and today i found this wonderful site, and let me tell you all magical people your stories and guides really helped me.

I promised myself to start helping others in this same predicament as i was and this forum seem to be the perfect place to start, i will donate on pay day since i feel in debt with you guys.

[SlapHappy]

The perfect place to start, if you have not already done so is to report your scammer's details to warn the 30-40 others/day that the scammer attempts to scam. You will also get ALL the steps to protect yourself and others.
http://blackmailscams.com.

[Peanutbuttahlovah]

I have to log back into my skype to get the information but i am scared they will contact me if i do.

I logged off and deactivated all my social media in desperation i didnt got the info from the scammer, i only have the website where i got the contact and the fake personal info from him.